CRUNCH TIME

GOOD DAY FRIEND. HOPEFULLY YOU ARE READING THIS THE FIRST TIME AROUND OUT OF THE GOODNESS OF YOUR HEART...AND NOT BECAUSE I HAVE HOUNDED YOU RELENTLESSLY TO SUPPORT MY MARATHON FUND RAISING CAUSE...OR THAT I AM CURRENTLY STANDING BEHIND YOU WALKING THROUGH THE DONATION PROCESS. AS YOU MAY OR MAY NOT KNOW, I AM TRAINING TO RUN THE NYC MARATHON ON NOVEMBER 5, 2006. JUDGING BY MY LOVE HANDLES, CRIPPLING ADDICTION TO SLEEP, MY COUCH AND AND IT'S BODY CAST OF MY LEFT SIDE, MY ELITE LEVEL OF XBOX PLAY AND GENERAL DISDAIN FOR ENDURANCE SPORTS, MANY OF YOU MAY SCOFF AT THIS ATTEMPT AND SAY "FAT CHANCE FAT FACE" WELL TO YOU NAY SAYERS, I SAY NAY. I SAY THAT ANYONE THAT IS WILLING TO SEMI - FULLY COMMIT TO A TRAINING REGIME AT THE LAST POSSIBLE DATE THAT WILL ENSURE MINIMAL EXPOSURE TO CATASTROPHIC KNEE/SHIN DAMAGE IS THE KIND OF PERSON THAT WILL MAKE THINGS HAPPEN. I ALSO THINK THAT PERSON WILL NOT ONLY FINISH THE MARATHON IN PERSONAL RECORD SETTING TIME (PREVIOUS RECORD NOT AVAILABLE), BUT WILL ALSO HOST A CELEBRATORY FUNCTION AFTER THE RACE AS WELL. THAT BEING SAID, ANY DONOR TO THIS CAUSE, NO MATTER HOW BIG OR SMALL, IS ENTITLED TO A PERSONALIZED RED, WHITE OR BLUE SOLO CUP FILLED WITH AS MUCH *BEER AS TWO TO FOUR KEGS WILL SUPPLY. THE LOCATION OF THIS "PARTY" WILL BE SUPPLIED SHORTLY, BUT IT WILL DEFINITELY BE HELD AT APPROX 4PM NOV 5, 2006.(http://www.teamforkids.org/)THERE ARE A LOT OF KIDS OUT THERE THAT DON'T HAVE ANYTHING TO KEEP THEIR LIVES POINTED IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION. THIS CHARITY FOCUSES ON STRUCTURING KIDS TO LEAD HEALTHY PRODUCTIVE LIVES. WE ARE TALKING ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGERS OF THE FUTURE, NOT THE F-KED'S. I KNOW THAT PEOPLE GET ASKED FOR MONEY EVERY DAY, AND WE ALL BECOME SO NUMB TO IT THAT MOST OF THE TIME WE REALLY DON'T CARE WHAT THE PERSON IS SAYING, OR WHY THEY ARE ASKING FOR THE MONEY. WE ALL SPEND AT LEAST FIVE DOLLARS A DAY ON SOMETHING WE DON'T REALLY NEED, IT WOULD BE NICE TO THINK ABOUT PUTTING IT TOWARDS SOMETHING THAT WILL HELP SOMEONE YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW OUT. EVERY SINGLE DOLLAR ON THE WAY TO THE GOAL COUNTS JUST AS MUCH AS ANOTHER. NO MATTER WHAT YOU CAN GIVE, IT IS MORE THAN ENOUGH. PLEASE PASS THIS WEBSITE ON TO WHOEVER YOU KNOW THAT LIKES KIDS, LOVES ME (EASY), OR JUST LIKE TO PROSPECT AND INVEST IN A CHEAP BEER IN THE FUTURE.


I still have about $800 or so dollars to raise for this young folks. Though I look forward to spending the American Express points that will go along with my paying the charity this money myself...I would much rather everyone out there join hands, sing a song of hope and throw a few bucks in to the pile. Remember, you get free beer on sunday after the race.....its a win win situation.

So... to recap.

1. WWW.TEAMFORKIDS.ORG
2. CLICK "CONTRIBUTE"
3. CLICK CONTINUE
4. CLICK CONTINUE
5. FILL OUT FORM, MY NUMBER IS 1732 AND LAST NAME IS LYONS.
6. FEEL GOOD ABOUT YOURSELF.

ITS THAT SIMPLE. I LOVE YOU ALL.

MANNY KAP + 100
MANOLIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII. LP. What would the world be with Manny Kap.? It wouldnt be a world with delicious Buffalo Wings. It wouldnt be a world with Original factory installed Tail lights on leased cars. And it wouldnt be a place where the blame for all things that went wrong could be blamed on one individual. I dont know about you, but it doesnt seem like a place I would want to live. Manny, you are the man bud...thanks for the VERY generous donation.....I know you have been saving for that penis reduction.


CHRIS THE GREEK AKA RDM + 50
VLAKA! I'm surprised you had the chance to stop at the website to donate. I know it cut in to either your online car shopping or Myspace mass "Hey, I dont usually do this...but I'm also a huge fan of (insert movie) and (insert band) is my favorite. I like (current band album), but man I can remember so listening to (previous band album) like 400 times in college at ivy league university University of Pennsylvania. Anyway, just wanted to say hi.....how could someone like you be single???!!!...awesome profile song by the way!" messages. I've never had a better friend that told me on a regular basis that he hates my guts. See you in Brookyln....fugehadeaboutit.

ROBERTO DONGO +20
Berto. You're a good man. Not only do you speak about cooking like it is a Trashy Romance novel, you have your act together and married a gorgeous woman at the age of 21. See you out there my man.

Luisa Collins+10
Thanks so much Luisa! Ever since I came to OSG you have been a great help! Thanks so much for the support.

Capt Andy Biederman +100
Block island to the far east, you've seen it all and done it all. I know you will be out there again soon living the good life. Thanks for the support

MAUREEN AULISA +25
Mo. Once my mortal enemy, now a very close aquaintence....my how far we have come. I give you a lot of credit
for the endurance trial you are performing on a regular basis being bff with Natalia. I would rather run 26 miles on broken glass bare foot than listen to her talk about anything. I would be nicer to Natalia at this point and say just kidding, but there is no way she will ever come close to any type of donation websitel....so no need to sugar coat it.

ADAM KANZER +25
This donation entitles you to one Rio Grande Margarita and whatever blackout comes along with it.

SHARI ADLER +25
Shari! My sisters beautiful friend with the great curly hair! Please reference above, you will not only be the the lucky drinker of and RGM, I'll throw in the steak nachos....AWESOME! Thanks so much

SHARON PETITO +25
I still remember the days when the Fab 5 walked through the halls of St. Francis prep with their cheerleading jackets and scrunchy socks. I remember them well because I was trying to figure out a way to hide in my sisters room to catch you guys changing during sleep overs. I trust you are still kicking peoples ass on a regular basis a la Tito Ortiz. I will be sure to give you a huge hug next time I see you. Thanks so much Sha'